True Darkness
by Hoehomi-Chan
Summary: This is an extra to my story Tight Stitches. Please read that before this! Oneshot. This tells of Sable's true pain, her inner angst, and what she wants to do to solve it...


**IMPORTANT: Before reading this, open a new tab and type in 'Skinny Love' by Birdy on Youtube. Play it, then read this out loud at the same time. It's wonderful.**

**Just a little spin-off I did to Tight Stitches. Nothing special or fancy, just dark, emo and gothic. What can I say? I've had a rough day. ^^**

...

"You're on your own."

As soon as those words- clipped, sharp, harsh- left his lips, my world tumbled into eternal darkness.

Inky darkness. Hardship. Suffering.

He's left all of these feelings for me to take on.

To soak up.

To feel.

It hurts. It hurts so damn much. The constant weight of let-down, constant sadness...

The tears always flow with no abandon. Salty, bitter tears...bitter.

How could he? I could swear he truly did love me back then. That night, when he came back? Surely that was proof.

Obviously not.

Here I am, shouldering all of the pain, my heart slowly twisting out of shape.

Those words- "you're on your own,".

Those words forced me away from my remaining family. They killed the remnants of the past I had been clinging to so desperately.

They killed part of me.

Part of me.

After my parents died, my world was juddered violently.

Something died inside of me.

When Tom left, leaving me for six years...

Something else died inside of me.

The only thing that I kept living for was my sister and very faintm hope I held tightly in cupped hands.

How could four short words let it slip away in seconds?

All that's left is me, a husk.

He took my soul, drained it away from me with a kiss. And when he so coolly spoke- those words- I was shattered. No longer am I alive. Emotionally. I'm as good as dead.

Love.

It will always elude me. After whats happened to me, it's understandable. But is there no drop of affection left for me? No happiness in the world?

He took all of that away in a moment, no matter how little there was. I wonder what his definition of love is. Because it's not like mine. His love is one of sin. It caught me, enraptured me, enthralled me...and broke me.

But...

Why do I still love him so much?

Even after he took my heart and tore it into shreds, I still love him. So, so much. It's ridiculous how much I burn with broken passion for him, after he rejected me so heartlessly.

It's forever dark where I am, and I'm tempted to keep it dark for eternity. The dark- it matches my burned, blackened love and crippled insides.

Tears- they won't solve anything, and yet I weep them so hard everyday. It hurts. I hurt. I ache. I long. I cry.

All I want is HIM.

It wouldn't sadden me to kill myself right here, right now.

There's only pain left in the world for me.

Friends.

Family.

Lover.

All of them were ripped away from me with his careless words.

He probably has no idea of my suffering.

In the morning I wake to the constant pain. Through the day I stumble through a never ending corridor of hurt and damage that's been acquired over these years. As soon as he left it began to hurt. But- four words- that hurt grew. It's grown so much I can hardly bear it, and I cry more times I can count.

I bet you don't know the true extent of my pain.

Imagine a knife. In your flesh. And have it constantly twisted, constantly snagging on veins and blood vessels, snapping them, causing so much pain that you need to die.

That option's not open for me. I have to live. I have to live in this cruel, heart breaking world, the world that had broken all of my bridges and overgrown the paths.

It's such a long and painful roast on the spit- sometimes time only makes it worse. You burn and blacken and are useless to everyone.

I bet no one knows what it's truly like crying yourself to sleep.

Once you start, there's no end. You'd think sleep was your one sweet escape, but no. The tears soak into your dreams, and you shatter, as fragile as glass.

The only thing that stops me from killing myself today is you.

You.

The very last remnant of hope I have to clutch tightly, else you'll slip through my fingers again.

Please.

Please, save me from this dark, painful nightmare.

Teach me how to love again.

Please.

Please, my unborn child.

You're barely a fraction of an inch, but do something.

I beg of you, baby.


End file.
